The Yes Yes Yes Ritual

Hello one and all!  This is a repost of Kenya K Steven’s Yes Yes Yes Ritual from 2007 – Kenya wrote this post prior to the Yes Man Movie was made, she wonders if Yes Man borrowed this very concept!  There have been many requests for this post online, so here it is!  Kenya took this post off her blog along with 200 other posts about her opening marriage to be published in a forthcoming book – Memoir of an Opening Marriage coming this spring!

Please Enjoy Kenya’s original post!  Share and comment please.


Wooooooow! As you know, the Equinox happened Friday evening, March 20, 2007.  Many cultures take this time to give something up or fast such as in Lint and Ramadan. I too decided to give something up. I am giving up the word NO as a first response, period.

So, my ritual was simple. I was told by my spiritual senses to go out ALONE into the world on a Friday Night and say YES to life. YES!  Say YES to life!  I was told that if I were to do this process, I’d soon see why I can easily trust the Universe to protect me, always.

A spiritual practice…

I purchased a special dress for this occasion. Spirit told me to wear white, so I bought a sassy white sweater dress from Banana Republic. I did not think a Lapa would quite do the trick. LOL! It is totally possible to do a private fasting ritual in a public place and look hot while doing it!

My husband literally dropped me off downtown at 10:00 PM. I was alone. He took me to the Four Seasons Hotel where I would start my evening at the Celebrity Chocolate Affair. This was really fun! My work? My ritual? My Mantra? YES, YES, YES. I did this ritual from 10:00 PM Friday – 10:00 AM Saturday Morning. The results? Amazing!

The first objective I wanted to achieve in doing this is to prove to myself that I trust my self-created Universal Law: We Only Attract Who and What We Are – Each person we attract is there for a purpose – to evolve us.

I had been having a problem trusting the people who walk into my life, when I know full well that if I trust basic universal premises then I have nothing at all to worry about in terms of who I meet. I am meeting myself every time. I am meeting like vibration. Maybe you too struggle with trust issues that stem from a lack of faith in Universal Order and then a lack of trust for even yourself, both of which lead to lack of trust in others.

So, to go out into the world, alone, on a Friday Night with no car, no plans, no money, no companions and looking FLY was quite courageous!  I would simply BE in places, SEE what comes, WATCH who comes, and OBSERVE my own ability to say YES to it all.

Why not? Why not say yes to all the Me’s I meet? Why not? Why not? (My nervous energy has me stuttering) I knew I would be challenged, but I am committed to being a YES girl. YES to life at last! Yes I Can do this!

Equinox Adventure Unfolds…

So, here I am at the Four Seasons. “Goodbye honey! Have a nice night.” My husband reluctantly dropped me off in the middle of nowhere, as he had a client that evening for a feminine rebalancing session that would last the entire night.

I was on my own. Damn. I forgot my iPod. Guess spirit doesn’t want me to distract myself and close off from the world. I meant to bring my man, oops, I mean my Mac. I had forgotten that too. This ritual was already yielding all the tools I needed to focus on the matter at hand – TRUST – attracting people and events to prove to myself that I can trust LIFE and say YES to life.

The first thing I noticed were the men at the door, they were the guards or Valets at the hotel. They were like “Hey beautiful. How you doing? Where are your friends?” Flattered, I turned around to tell them that I was hanging out alone this evening. I giggled as they watched me sway through the revolving glass door, trimmed in luxurious brass encasement. Lovely hotel, that Four Seasons in Atlanta. This was beginning well. I attracted a guard to watch over me and send me love…

Upstairs at the event, I first went to the bathroom to check the mirror. I found a beautiful European woman in the mirror looking at herself. Then, two more professional looking women walked into the bathroom. I started a conversation with them. We talked a while, only to find that the original woman was upset about her husband looking younger than her. I gave this woman a serious boost of Juju Power. I told her that she was amazingly beautiful, and she should always know he is with her because he loves her. The other two women chimed in. I showed the ladies my book and told the original woman that this may help – maybe she needs to develop a more intimate relationship with her feminine self.

All the ladies were pleased with my spiel. They all gave me business cards, and we all walked out of the bathroom together. When I looked down at the cards I had received, one of the women was the owner and president of a television station local to Atlanta! WOW! I was just talking about doing a reality show. I tucked the card away and made a mental note to call this woman on Monday. Fabulous so far!

When I finally found a place to sit at this posh and crowded affair, I found myself sitting near two men and one woman. They were in the midst of a wonderful conversation about a seminar they had attended that day. The seminar was all about the Law of Attraction! What? How could I have, from a possibility of dozens of tables, just happened to sit down to this discussion? I happily joined in. Once we were complete, I had booked one of the men for a weekend couples consultation! WOW! This is just the first 60 minutes of my ritual!

I excused myself, because I wanted to go work the room a bit, mingle and all that jazz. I LOVE to mingle! So, I started to walk into the grande central area. I saw many paintings on display, so I stopped to ask one of the men if he was the artist. He said no, but he pointed to another man who was the artist. As soon as I saw this guy, I began doting on the images and lavishly giving him his due credit. The paintings were awesome! I affirmed that he would be commissioned to do my entire home! YES to my desire to have a famous artist deliver original work for my home!

As I walked back to my chair, a group of men sitting on a cozy couch were like – WOW – you know all eyes are on you girl! I was like, what? They stood and shook my hand, and beckoned me to sit and relax. Come to find out, these men were prominent in the community, one a doctor, one a lawyer, and one an IT guy for small businesses. We spoke for a long time, as I had them completely enthralled, especially the doctor, about how I survived cancer. It was Lovely. They all gave me cards and tons of love. YES to making new friends and YES to sharing my story and YES to allowing men to be men, receiving compliments, being flirty – loving it! I like to flirt, why not YES!?

It was time to go. I had been here for a while and had really worked the room. With a purse full of new friends’ information and my white dress gleaming, I went down to the lobby to catch a cab. The same guards were there scrambling to get me a cab – but to where?  And shit I had no money!  Guardians – I love it ~ Do you need a cab? – YES!  I suppose…

As soon as I hit the outdoors, I received a text. “Hey – I am working the Lucky Lounge tonight, what are you doing? Come on over – I can get you in the door.” A handsome friend beckoned me to come hang out until he got off work at Lucky. YES! How did he know I was in the city? I am usually at home on a Friday Night. Eureka!  And since I purposefully had no money, I asked the he pay for my cab I was hoping into without a dime!

TO the Lucky Lounge!

The cab driver was really cool. YES to his jokes; he had me laughing like a hyena – we were talking about Nigeria and how everyone says to watch out for Nigerians (he is Nigerian) because they are charmers. YES to giving him compliments about his home country. YES to allowing myself to have pleasant exchanges. YES to my male friend waiting for me at Lucky Lounge tipping him more than 20%! Keep the change! Kings! I love you – both!

The line was long, I did not stand on that line. He came over, grabbed my hand, and ushered me directly to the front door. He spoke to the cash lady and handed her a bill. He kissed my cheek and told me to have fun. That was it! No strings attached! YES.

I walked around the club and felt the vibes a bit. Hungry as hell, I put in my request to have a table. The line was long for tables, so she told me she’d text when a table opened. I was like, “man!”, but I said “YES” to waiting patiently; YES to keeping a positive disposition.

Undefeated, I took my hungry arse to the dance floor. These people seemed to be younger than me, and with my elegant white dress on, not too many men seemed confident enough to check me. Cool. I’d dance alone. I danced to T.I., Souljaboy, and other anthems that everyone knew like… crazy leg? I have never heard that one. I’m getting old. LOL! YES to today’s music!

As I danced with myself, slipping into a semi state of trance, this man popped into my reality. He just came right over and started to dance with me. At first glance I was like, OK, what is this man doing? Was he going to try to get me to do the crazy leg? Did he want to lift my leg and dance like all the others, because I am a DIVA, can’t be dancing like a freak in the club…wait…I was about to say NO when I recalled my ritual. YES to the dance.

We danced a few songs and he did not try to feel my booty or anything, so we talked a moment. He asked me if I wanted a drink, I said NO, my first no of the evening. But it is Equinox, no alcohol. But that is a NO. LOL! Anyway, he did not ask me if I wanted alcohol, he asked me if I wanted a drink. YES, water please. Then, he asked me if I was hungry. YES, YES, YES. He snapped his fingers a few times and the servers came to him. He told them that I wanted to eat. They said I’d have to wait for a table. He told them a few more words, and the next thing you know I had a menu and then a lovely plate of sushi to go with my water.

This man was on point. YES to that! He stayed with me the entire evening and seemed to be at my beck and call. We danced fabulously together (I love to dance). He kept telling me that there are no strings attached. I mean, he literally said these words from his mouth several times. He said he just wanted to protect me. God Damn! Sorry, I mean WOW!

I mean hours passed. If I was on the back porch having a clove, he would come and peek in and ask me if I was OK. I was fine, talking to another brother on the porch about, you guessed it, the Law of Attraction! LOL! This hood looking dude was telling me all about his study of Dr. Wayne Dyer! LOL! I was floored. Not that young African American males do not read, but that I was at a night club talking spirituality on my YES night. And, that I was being guarded by the most gentle, smooth and creamy men you ever want to meet. Not so super fine (which is why I almost said NO) but surely divine.

So, our dance turned into hand dancing. Amazing. I began to really love this cat in terms of his eloquence and respect for me. He was a charmer for sure. We were hand dancing as everyone else was doing the butt. LOL! I had a marvelous time. We literally danced until the lights came on – at which time I knew I was going to meet my other friend who had serendipitously let me in. My dancing man was offering to take me home! I live like 40 miles from the city!  YES!  But only if my other friend couldn’t…

They kicked us all out of the club – don’t know where you gonna go, but you have to get the hell outta here! LOL! I came into the night air with a chill to my back. There on the stoop, I met the greatest guys in the world. Yes, more men! What are you ladies talking about there are no good men here? What? They were traveling and doing some business of some sort. They liked my style, they opened their phones and “friended” me on Facebook! Wild!  Another Yes!

I did not see my original friend; he was still working in the club I guessed. But, my dancing man found me – again – and offered his coat. YES, YES, YES. Thank you. Now, to this one I may have said no a while back, I mean I don’t want him to be cold without his jacket.  Yes, I’d have said not to the coat for that silly reason at a time in my life… But I was learning to receive… Yes!  Anyway, he left me there with his coat and told me that if I left with it to call him in the AM. What? OK. Now, that is chivalry. And, I believe in it, which is why I attracted it. YES.

Men Are So Beautiful…

Pretty soon, my guy pulled up in his car. ‘You ready to go?”. YES. Bam, my dancing man showed up at the same exact moment. I thought, shit, these guys are both going to think I am playing them. But, I was not and do not play men. I am real and open and free and highly respectful of the masculine. Do you know what I did? I took both of their hands and told them, at the same time, ‘you guys are absolute kings, I told man #1 that man #2 had protected me all night, helped me with dinner, and watched over me. I told man # 2 that man #1 had paid my way and saved me from the line. As I held both hands, they seemed soothed. They felt good just knowing they were men doing what men do, protecting and cherishing women. Smooth, I know. Daring, but smooth. Goodbye man #2 – I’ll text tomorrow. ‘Are you ok?’ YES.

In the car with this great guy who was taking me home to my posh suburban town, I thought of the evening. He is on my Sun Manifestation System so I told him all about the ritual. He said “Does that mean you are going to say yes to everything tonight?” My tentacles went up. (And so what’s it to you? Are you trying to get some? That was stupid old paradigm madness). I shut that up, and shut down for a moment. I did not answer him with that same bouncy YES.

I knew I would be tested. Ok, how to handle this. Good looking man driving me home. Good looking man asking me if I will say yes to him. Good looking man making me shy again, making me recoil into the old cautious Kenya K. I thought and thought. “Do you have a girlfriend?” “YES,” he said. Good I thought, now I can easily say NO like usual. It was morally wrong, after all, for me to spend time with this man who has a girlfriend if she does not know.

He wasn’t headed to my house. He was headed to his. Take me home please. NO came hard. But don’t get me wrong. I knew this was a test of sorts. I was still bubbly and happy on the outside, but on the inside I was conflicted. He took me home. I invited him in to watch one of my YouTube videos. YES. I was inviting him inside… I had to get to the bottom of this. The ritual was doing its job. It ain’t always going to be easy to say YES. It’s not that I wanted him to go, hell no, in my heart I wanted him there and to be in his arms a bit; but, the conflict was HUGE.

I was trying really hard guys. No one was home as my husband was sleeping out and kids were sleeping out as well. We are all alone, YouTube over, what to do? I thought of a quick idea. I’d put him on a pallet on the floor. Perfect and safe! So I’d lay on the bed and him on the floor, and we’d talk all night. I loved talking to him; he, like me, is a fan of Eckart Tolle. He is a deep brother with loads of Quantum juice. He took a shower and he seemed even juicier, but, to the floor my friend.

I reached out to touch his hand. We held hands and talked Quantum. I told him, eventually, about my quandary with him having a woman. YES to being authentic. He helped me sort it out.

Finally, I saw that what I deem morality is really a cover up for being afraid to live!

It’s the same thing my husband always told me. I deem everything that I am afraid to do as being morally wrong; as though it is morally wrong to live ones passion.

This: My mother would kill me if I do not become a lawyer. I hate law, but she paid for school.

Is the same as…

This: My mother would kill me if I have an open relationship, she would just freak out. I cannot do it no matter what.

Is the same as…

This: If I love another person’s boyfriend, I will feel guilty about it and fearful that she may find – out or worse – someone will do it to me.

When in actuality, we are ALL choosing our lives. This man’s girlfriend is no different. What if I loved her man, she found out about it, then she realized that she deserves better, and then tries to leave him but realizes she loves him more than words can say? And, then decides to stay and work through this, which in turn shifts their relationship upward and opens them to real authenticity. And, she moves beyond fear and lack of trust which caused her to create him “cheating” in the first place? Then who is the bad guy? I might actually be considered the good guy in that case!

I know, I know, you guys are like, whatever Kenya K…

Well, I will give you one more. What if I decided to love her man, and then she found out and decided to leave her man, then years later she thought back and realized that she gave up the 95% of his good stuff because of her fear of 5% of his “bad” stuff? Then met another great man (there are billions of these), and this time decided that no matter what, she was going to work out any issues with him because she recalled the one she let go over, basically, nothing at all? What of that?

We always win at life. Nothing is against us. Everything is working in our favor all of the time. Right and Wrong are relative and basically, non-existent outside of context. My final hurdle jumped! My morality excuse sank like the titanic taking all the old parts of me that found excuses to not following my bliss were finally unraveled.

So, “YES.” I said “YES” to being held and receiving love.

I said “YES” to life this awesome morning, and I completed my ritual with full knowledge that I walked through the Equinox door with great esteem and loving help from my guides.  This man laid into me… OMG.  He made love to me like Michael Jordan played basketball… Fine as wine!  He became many men dunking into my soul… luscious ~ like the Fab Five! He created in my body the feeling of bottomless oceans, the feeling of sinking, flowing, moving with the tides.  His penis and mind and spirit coordinated to give me an experience of myself that jump started a revolution inside.  I could no longer say no, if I had, I’d have been deleted from the Akashic Records, erased immediately from the planet.  This cosmic man with this very beautiful body and spirit made me into a very deep and a very rich woman that day…

Now, this may seem odd to you. But for me, this is one of the best Equinox rituals ever! I am finally free! I will always say YES to my heart’s desires. Restraint comes only when I feel that the YES is coming from fear, anger, ego, conditioning, old habits, or wrong beliefs.

YES to living truth! Love to you!  If you need support learning to say yes!  Call me 

Kenya K Stevens


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