The Toll of Racism on Black Relationships

This post was inspired by a member of our Progressive Love community.  He made various points about how White Supremacy (WS) or White Supremacy Racism (WSR) affects black men’s ability to have successful relationships with black women.  I wanted to address his point (and I have already in our Facebook group), but also make sure I was thorough enough so that all points are considered as well as the metaphysical and the feminine perspectives.  And actually, I prefer the term Institutionalized Racism (IR) over WS or WSR because IR represents a mode of thinking being a part of the culture without people’s awareness of it, which is true for 98% of Americans.  Only a small percentage of people are actually conscious of and capable of implementing a global, systematic campaigned aimed at dividing mass populations of people in the name of WS.  Everyone else is simply subject to this mode of thinking without much awareness.  Additionally, WS doesn’t empower white people or make them supreme in any way, but only gives them greater access to resources.  As I’ve stated in my other article President Obama, Race, and Ferguson, IR is really about classism and resource allocation.


Point #1 – The System of White Supremacy turns Black Men into Women

IR is a system developed when racism becomes a part of the fabric of a society over centuries.  Racism is way of thinking that defines and classifies people by color, external features, and language.  At it’s core, it’s a bias.  IR applies serious pressure and friction to people of color.  The darker the skin color the harsher the bias.  It limits what people can do without making a serious effort.  Does IR feminize men?  Yes, it does.  IR takes away role models, reduces opportunity to have self esteem, and paints a picture of black men as being lesser than other men on the planet.  At the least these factors can make it tough for a black male to become a man.  At the most it can completely break him such that he embraces his negative masculine nature (i.e. the Dark Side) or his feminine at the expense of his masculine.

However, making a man requires pressure, friction, resistance, and conflict.  That’s how men are made.  Something has to bring out that masculinity.  If it wasn’t IR it would be something else.  That friction along with guidance, encouragement, nourishment, and wisdom will guide a man into his masculine potential (i.e. manhood).  That’s the formula.

You have to remember that African Americans and black people in the Americas are actually descendants of the Kemetic empire.  We traveled west and south after our empire began to fall, centuries before any contact with Europeans.  The Africans that helped sell us into slavery tend to be of a different lineage than those of ancient Kemet.  Long story short – we are the descendants of Kemet in the Americas.


What About Spirituality?

What’s left out of these IR discussions is the spiritual aspect of what happened to us and what’s currently happening to us as Kemetic descendants.  The Atlantic and other slave trades are our doing as Kemetic people.  This is a spiritual journey we chose to embark upon.  We knew this before we sent our ancestors to the north to endure the worst living conditions anyone would ever know.  We shook hands, hugged, and embraced our brothers and sisters before we sent them to their ‘almost death’.  We knew the next time we saw them thousands of years later there would be hell to pay.  We knew the next time they saw us they wouldn’t recognize us.  We knew that we would have incarnate multiple times through those ancestors and experience those harsh conditions personally multiple times over.  We knew the next time they saw us they would have a deep subconscious LOVE and LOATHING for us such that they can’t live with us and can’t live without us.  We knew the next time we saw them our empire would be completely and totally decimated and we’d have little to no knowledge of self.  We knew we’d be scattered throughout Africa and other continents and without any unification by the time they saw us again.  That’s why we wrote the story of Ausar so we could be reminded that our knowledge and everything we built spiritually would be scattered around the world and as our priests reincarnated they would have to put the puzzle back together while living in the belly of the beast.


We also knew that THEY are US

The problem with black people today is they don’t acknowledge the goddess and the feminine element in our society.  Why is that important?  Because she’s the only one with access to our history.  She’s the one with the ability to go into trance and pull back our spiritual and other sciences.  She has the ability to see it clear as day.  That’s why Auset went on the journey to find Ausar and put his body back together.  She’s the key.  You can’t go to war until you understand what you’re fighting or who you are or where you’re going or how you got here.  Meanwhile, the men keep digging through the ruins looking for clues, which will take centuries and never complete the puzzle.

I completely understand why people just look at IR or the challenges of black people from ONLY a logical left brained perspective.  I get it.  From that perspective things look unfair, futile, and out of balance.  But our greatness as a people was founded in our ability to join the right and left hemispheres of the brain to maximize our abilities individually and collectively.  If you’re only looking at things from a left brained logical perspective, you’re officially a victim of IR because your thinking is limited.  It’s like looking at life through a pinhole.  IR forces you to have a segregative view of life, which violates our greatest spirituality as Kemetic people.  It violates the god within us to only look at life through our right eye rather than our right, left, and third.  We’ve forgotten who we are.


All Are Affected

So, yes, IR is a pressure point that can keep a black man out of his masculine and potentially force him into his feminine.  But let’s be clear it works the same way for white men.  IR gives white men a FALSE sense of superiority.  It makes white men feel like their fully in their masculine just for being born.  That thought pattern is equally, although differently, damaging because when these men fail in work, relationships, sports, and life it brings home a hard truth about who they really are outside of the illusions painted by IR.  When you look at erectile dysfunction across the US, we’re talking about mostly white males.  Why?  Because there are serious issues with their masculinity, sexuality, and health.  Where do the health issues come from?  From thinking and acting in a way that is counter to their biology and masculine nature.

If you look at many of the health and mental illness issues found in the white community, many of them can be attributed to IR.  It can be argued that the most stressed and ill-health people on earth are white males in America.  This fact is only shocking because of the obvious disparity in access to resources, food, water, and luxury living conditions found here in the west.  There’s no real explanation or reason for white males in America to be of ill health and suffering from ED at such alarming rates other than their lifestyle and way of thinking (i.e. IR) leading them down a destructive path.

It’s a complete and total myth that white men are not adversely affected by the system of IR.  They are affected equally, but differently.  What’s good for the goose is ALWAYS good for the gander.  What goes up, must come down.  For every high there must be a low.  If you aren’t able to see it then you need to learn to see.  Try opening your third eye or studying Universal Law.

I’m not trying to say that IR affects black and white people the SAME.  No.  I’m saying, when you add up the totality of it’s effects across generations from its inception until it’s end – the damage will be equal.  I’m saying the cumulative impact to all individuals is equal.  It’s a metaphysical fact.


Point #2 – Black Women are not as Affected by IR as Black Men

As I said, Auset is the key to our success as Kemetic descendants.  Auset was seen as a threat by Set, but wasn’t universally hunted and feared in the same way a man would be.  I agree black women are not directly attacked and seen as a threat in the same way black men are under the system of IR.  A woman is metaphorized as water and is therefore able to adjust, change, and flow with her environment.  She can become invisible (i.e. vapor) at times and take the form of what the environment demands she become to survive.

However, her indirect impact from IR is greater than the indirect impact black men would experience and that’s where the equation balances.  The things that affect a man won’t necessarily have the same effect on a woman and vice versa.  For example, a woman’s son being killed will affect her much deeper than his father because of her emotional connection to a child she carried in her womb for nine months.  Her witnessing her husband beat down, tortured, or failing affects her deeply.  This fact cannot be underestimated and to not recognize it equates to not understanding and recognizing the feminine.

Lastly, you can’t just be a woman in the midst of IR because a woman in her feminine is a goddess and powerful and therefore seen as a threat.  We all too often see women adjust their behavior, look, belief system, or inner desires to fit the limits and demands of IR.  It’s precisely the behavior that many men complain about of women that are a direct result of IR.  What you may be judging as a woman being a woman may be further from the truth.  The truth is both the IR power structure and black men are fearful of any black women fully expressing her womanhood because it would mean the end of the current paradigm as we know it and not many are ready for that kind of change, including black men.  At the end of the day, she is feared by all.


Point #3 – The Re-empowered Black Male

Only, black men can empower black men.  Only you can empower you.  It’s true the system of IR exists, but complaining about it and giving it more power than it actually has is a waste of time.  Our efforts as black men should only be on growth in every phase of life – spiritually, economically, physically, mentally, and as leaders on the planet.  No matter when you incarnate there will be a ‘force’ holding you down and holding you back.  Even in a thriving Kemetic culture, rich with initiations for men and women and healthy relationships, and an abundance of resources will produce major challenges to you in your development as a man or woman.  It’s the same work.  How do we know?  Because you don’t see black people uniting because they know it’s going to be difficult no matter what.  If we all lived in an entirely black nation we’d still have folks complaining about this or that.  We still have numerous failures and outcasts.  Think about this.

I agree with the point of a man working for another man feminizing him, but ONLY when that work is not his passion.  I’ve witnessed both sides where men slowly lose testosterone over time messing with a job to just pay the bills.  It’s sad to watch.  That has less to do with IR and more to do with a man being willing to be in his WARRIOR archetype and make his OWN way in the world.  The same thing happens to boys going to public school – it sucks the life force right out of them.  Again, women are better able to adjust to both of these scenarios, but it affects them as well.  Women often have to get deep into their masculine energy to get up and go to these jobs every single day.  What’s the result?  A loss in magnetism and ability to attract the partners and life they desire.  An inability to tap into their orgasmic potential and feel the heights of pleasure.  Increased stress levels and the accompanying illnesses.


Point #4 – The Affects of Food Modification

It’s true that foods have been greatly modified; however, the biggest issue is not the food modification, but the foods that black people CHOOSE to eat.  Even with all the food modification, there are still plenty of high quality foods available.  One of the difficult things with our current environment is we actually have too many choices about what we can do and how to spend our time and what we can eat.  We’re seeing that the gravitational pull of various foods and lifestyles is challenging our inner fortitude to the point where most people realize they are not in control of themselves.  Most people are realizing they aren’t able to easily make the choices they KNOW are best for them and their lifestyle.  This is true for the food as well.

Even those with no knowledge of eating organic, green, grass-fed, etc know that drinking too many sodas is not the answer or eating too much fast food has it’s drawbacks.  Even when we don’t know, we know.  Again, the real issue boils down to choice.  Can you escape the gravitational pull of your inner weaknesses?


Point #5 – The Feminine Force as a Destructive Force

Actually, the masculine and feminine both have equal ability and tendency to be destructive.  It’s the masculine’s role to change manifested reality from one form to another – that’s destruction.  For example, WAR is a destructive force.  Building a city is both a destructive and constructive force.  The feminine destroys in a different way.  It erodes the foundation of a structure over time (i.e. waves hitting the rocks until they crumble over thousands of years).  The feminine is patient, but steady.  The concept of IR is a masculine concept, although imbalanced, and not much is more destructive than that.

Again, looking at the feminine as a destructive force is a result of IR thinking.  It has us look at women and black women; especially, as some kind of problem that needs to be kept in check.  That can’t be further from the truth.  The masculine and feminine are equal in their effects and capabilities, but do things entirely differently.  They are NOT the same.

I’m hoping that all people can take an empowered perspective on race and racism.  The truth is, a change in thinking is required to end it and heal all peoples.  It’s the same change in thinking for everyone believe it or not.  We must understand that a Progressive Way of Thinking is the Answer We all Seek:

—We individually and collectively create our lives

—The purpose of relating and interacting with one another is growth

—There are no victims in life

—There are no villains in life

—There is no need to or no way to drop out of any situation in life

—There is no need to or no way to cop out of any situation in life

—There is no need to feel shame for who you are or to you judge your past actions

—There is no need to blame others for who they are or to judge their actions


We must understand the highest wisdom from or ancestors:

OMNIPRESENCE: We are one with all things; although, we appear to be separate and disconnected

OMNIPOTENCE: We have the power to achieve our purpose, passion, and vision in life.  Always.  Without Exception.

OMNISCIENCE: No thing has a quality in an of itself and everything can and will be known to us.


One Love,


[author title=”Carl E. Stevens, Jr.” author_id=””]

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